Three people sharing with each other.

Event Intimacy and Vulnerability

Event Intimacy & Vulnerability

I’ve started writing this post SO many times that I’ve lost count. I’m struggling with how connected moments of vulnerability are to intimacy and active learning. And I’m energized by the conversations and experiences I’ve had with others over the last week around needing to move events in this direction. But, on the flip side, I’m witnessing a cultural norm that scares me. Statistically, we chose to learn passively over actively because of the risks. As a result, I see organizations investing in and participants lining up for passive learning, like large auditorium simulcasts and speaker-focused events. This production style offers networking in addition to information distribution. Still, networking is inherently transactional. We choose those to connect with rather than unite with others that can place us outside our comfort zone. We select the conversations we want to engage in rather than follow a designed conversation to create learning moments.

Thanks for staying with me. The connection between our desire to remain passive relates to vulnerability and intimacy. Active learning opens us to sharing at levels that can help us grow and make us uncomfortable. Doing so in a large group compounds the stress. So as event owners, how do vulnerability, intimacy, and active learning relate? And how can we use this understanding of the interaction between these design elements to create high-impact learning experiences for our audiences?

Three people sharing with each other.

Event Intimacy

Intimacy is a matter of interaction design, not audience size. The ideal number of participants for intimate group work is an entire article. At MYNDDSET, we typically design interactions around groups of three, whether the audience size is 1000 or 30.

How an emcee, expert, or instructor engages with an audience impacts event intimacy. For example, it is possible to “feel” a deep connection with someone on stage if they create the impression of having a 1:1 conversation with you. Therefore, coaching anyone who takes the stage for your event is vital to ensuring intimacy at scale.

The last aspect of creating event intimacy is time. Cycling through group work and moments of exploring ideas with an expert presenter is a balance of minutes, not hours. Plan and communicate the rules of engagement for interactions. Ensure your speakers know what you expect from every hour. We recommend that speakers take center stage for 1/3 of their session and dedicate the remaining time to small group work.

Creating intimacy can seem tactical, so let’s explore its relationship to inspiring human vulnerability.

Participant Vulnerability

Intimate small groups allow orchestrated time to share and acknowledge what each group member offers. The small size also provides a platform for all voices to surface. When groups surpass three members, louder, more confident voices can dominate. The keys to consider are allowing everyone to share, respond, and have equal time to do both. But this is not enough to bring about moments of vulnerability.

Asking questions that require participants to think deeply and share openly, even if it means sharing somewhat in-depth personal stories, is vital to hosting high-impact learning experiences. Asking participants to share their pains and problems related to your topic is a great start. The goal of the emcee or speaker is to model the level of sharing needed to move the group forward and describe the rules to ensure dynamic and equitable conversations. If you missed our article on asking great questions, check it out.

 

Active Learning

Active learning can seem intimidating. However, we can lessen intimidation by considering how to produce and lead sessions offering intimacy and safe vulnerability. Giving participants the right environment to share and not be judged but be heard and acknowledged prepares them to try bolder actions with more risks.

Thanks for spending time with MYNDDSET.

Cheers!
Mark Burke
Founder and Lead Experience Designer
MYNDDSET

Think RIDICULOUS, achieve RIGOR, Dr. Emma Fleck, Ep.32

On this episode, Dr. Emma Fleck, Department Head, Management and Marketing, Sigmund Weis School of Business at Susquehanna University and Associate Professor of Entrepreneurship, joins me to share how she uses the ridiculous to achieve rigor in her classes. As we aim to build entrepreneurial spirit in adaptable entrepreneurial ecosystems, we can’t depend on predictable thinking to solve complex problems. Known for connecting her students to their inner superhero, Emma is a leader in innovative and timely entrepreneurial mindset development.

Connect with Emma on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/emfleck/
Or, send her a message at Susquehanna University, Selinsgrove PA

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Leveraging Disruption to Fuel Innovation, Anthony Warren, Ep.31

Have you ever wondered why some entrepreneurs and organizations fail, while some thrive through chaos and manage to drive innovation? Join my discussion with Anthony Warren, founder of Apitra Innovations, an organizational development and workforce innovation consultancy based in Minneapolis, Minnesota. Anthony shares 5 tips to help you innovate through chaos.

Connect with Anthony by shooting him an email.
Head over to Anthony’s profile page on LinkedIn (linkedin.com/in/anwarren/).
Visit Anthony’s website apitra.com (note…his site is currently going through a few updates).

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MYNDDCAST.LIVE, “PFEW now, more than EVER!”, Ep.30

Join me and guest Scott Lee, VP of Marketing and Development, Foundation for Free Enterprise Education, along with 20 guest participants as we explore why now, more than ever, Pennsylvania Free Enterprise Week (PFEW) is needed. PFEW is a one-of-a-kind summer program that offers in-coming high school juniors and seniors a unique and challenging opportunity to see what it is like to run their own business.

Our conversation moved past WHAT the students do and focused on the WHY. I guide the group in applying the Conceptual Age Leadership THINKING mindset to influence the student’s SEEING (seeing reality as it is), BEING (aligning behaviors to reality), ACTING (creating for reality), and EXPRESSING (impacting reality).

Now, more than ever, we need to think deeply about how we foster young minds. PFEW is well positioned to do this important work. To learn more about PFEW, visit https://pfew.org

In 2018, I wrote Applying Thinking Patterns to Ethics Case Study Activity: Destructive Emotions Avoided, a review of the power of thinking on emotions at PFEW.

Resources
MYNDDCAST.LIVE Chat Log (View the attendee roles and their response to “Why PFEW?”
MYNDDCAST.LIVE, YouTube Video of the Zoom call.
MYNDDCAST.LIVE, PFEW Zoom Group Photo

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Virtual Rehearsals, This Middle School Band Plays On, Susan Meyer Patterson, Ep.29

Stepping outside her title, her norms, her comfort zone, being creative, being BRAVE, this Texas Music Educator ensures the band plays on. On March 16th, Mrs. Susan Meyer Patterson’s post found its way to my Facebook News Feed here in Central PA all the way from Conroe ISD, Texas. Okay, I know that’s not far in our connected virtual world, but distance isn’t the story. Knowing her students NEED music, she dove in, fired up Zoom, grabbed her baton and counted them in. Join me as I share Susan’s work to ensure the Band Plays On!

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The New Normal, MYNDDCAST.LIVE with Denny Hummer, Bucknell University SBDC, Ep.28

The New Normal = Bringing the Unfamiliar into Practice…How do we do that? The New Normal isn’t a time in the future. No. The New Normal is NOW! We’re not predicting, estimating, hypothesizing about the New Normal. We’re living it. Dealing, coping, adapting..those are needed skills. But how will we start a journey toward THRIVING?

On this first edition of MYNDDCAST.LIVE, an interactive version of MYNDDCAST, I’m joined by Denny Hummer of the Bucknell University SBDC and several guests to introduce a framework for thinking about the New Normal . This interactive format provides guests the chance to share their thoughts and experiences as we explore transformational topics.

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MYNDDCAST.LIVE, EP.28 Youtube Link

Social Distancing, Business Shifts, BIG CHANGES! Knowing ourselves & others to THRIVE, Ep.27

The coronavirus has caused businesses, non-profits, entrepreneurs, schools and hospitals, pretty much every segment of business to shift norms, ways of working and doing business. How we respond as organizations depends on how we as individuals unite, each with our unique combination of behaviors and attitudes.  In this episode, we’ll explore what we know about behaviors and attitudes and how understanding these human traits helps us in times of dramatic change and how an organizational effort to grow our understanding of ourselves and others is a timely investment.

There are many ways organizations are shifting.  The themes include

1. Digital Transformation (Building new digital tools and services)
2. Changing Delivery Modes (Schools, Restaurants, Health Clubs, Human Services)
3. Ramping Down (Manufacturers, Hospitals, Entrepreneurs)
4. Forced Closures (For compliance, for the safety of staff and those we serve)
5. Forced Continuance Planning (Maintaining business as usual)
6. Telework (The new reality for a significant percentage of our population)

How do these shifts affect us, each with our own natural behaviors and attitudes toward new things, our environment, learning and others?    

Limited time, high risks, countless unknowns,  little to no budget, a development cycle nightmare.  The model of try-fail-iterate-try again can teach us much.  Failure, the kind that pushes us to new answers, the act of building, getting feedback and making changes to products and services without high investment, while incredibly promising, pushes us to understand ourselves and others at a time when the stakes are high. 

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High “S”s Know How to Climb

Climbing is an act of steady performance. Relax, don’t get too eager and make mistakes. One step, another, and another. Focus and be patient. If you’re a High “C”, you like, no…NEED…clearly defined goals to take action. You probably never use the phrase, “Let’s just jump right in and see what happens.” Sound like you? And, having a support team you trust is important to you. Trust is earned and you need to see that others offer stability. If they cause chaos, they’re not getting connected to your safety rope anytime soon. Regularity in your day and projects make you a driven player. You will reach the mountain top, but on your own time, you know rushing is dangerous. Causing unexpected landslides is REALLY dangerous and you do everything to avoid that.

You’re known for your persistence. You can be a great source of encouragement to your team when a storm starts to build. Helping everyone stay together and on course is your strength. That trait can also be a HUGE source of stress. That storm brewing shifts course and heads in your direction, quickly. In this moment, a confrontation starts to develop. One of the team members wants to change plans, NOW. You don’t have all the information you need so you attempt to slow the pace of the decision. You’re being asked to be flexible and impulsive and you start to shut down. The team starts to steamroll over you and before you know it, they move out. What you’re feeling right now is anything but “business as usual.”

Consistency, you believe in it, practice it, trust it. You bring awareness to the team that in times of change and turmoil, consistent actions and norms lead to success. You start to clear chaos on the team and even though the path has changed, you make sure to bring regulation back to your efforts. Just because the course has changed doesn’t mean you bury all your proven tactics. Those on your team that love change, embrace it, BRING IT ON themselves, you know they can create amazing new opportunities. But, they seem reckless to you. You can support change and innovation by showcasing how patience can lead to quality. They may ignore you when you try to hide in the background a bit, so learning how to share your insights means letting others know how you think and what your needs are. Likewise, you know bringing others on your adventure means you can reach the top of the highest mountain, no matter what the world throws at you. This means taking your hands out of your pockets once in a while and recognizing the need to sell an idea or thought with passion. It feels uncomfortable, but you know adaptation is not all about others adapting to you. If anyone gets that, you do. By tapping into your persistence, you can gain the trust of many.

When your team needs to climb the HighEST mountain, they need you.

Saddle Up, High “I’ers”

High “I” yo Silver, away! The stories of the Lone Ranger and his quest to bring law and order to the people. Noble. Heroic. Humble. Stories teach, right wrongs, inspire us to action, connect us. If you’re a High I, an influencer, you have the natural ability to engage others through your words. You see a bright future and you HAVE to share it. On your team, you are counted on to “sell” it, whatever IT is. When the group needs someone to share what they just can’t seem to, they look in your direction. You saddle up. You take the reins and gallop full speed ahead and run with it.

You believe you can convince others of almost anything. All we “others” need to do is listen and learn. We’ll eventually come around to seeing things the way you do. When others seem disinterested, you start to feel weighed down. A phrase you may repeat to yourself is “They’re crushing my mojo.” When others don’t want to run at your speed, you may just leave them behind. Should you though? You know from time to time, you find yourself all alone in the corral. Others have moved on, but you’re still going in circles sharing the story you want to share. The “others” are telling you something. They’re telling you that work needs something else from you, some other focus. If you can’t join, the work will leave you behind. That feels scary, and lonely. This is not a place you want to be.

In the post, Embrace Your High-C Behaviors, a connection between High-Cs and High-Is was formed. Gallop over and give that a read. As a High-I, you feel comfortable making connections with others. The power behind your not so dark mask is being rather demanding. This can be off-putting to others, such as High-Ss, who are steady, relaxed, predictable, and modest. Rather than riding full speed up to a High-S, pull back and come to a trot before you get close. Come up along side them, say “Hello”, ride quietly for a bit and then ask how they see or think about the situation. As the story unfolds, you’ll come into your element. Hearing the pieces of evidence unfold from a logical perspective, you are forming what will become an amazing creation of a story. You can go away informed. Be careful, your job is to stay in the saddle, let the ride happen, listen, take it all in. Don’t push the pace or grab their reins. When you’re finished, guide your trusty steed quietly off. If you feel the urge to kick up some dust, just wait a bit. Once you’re out of sight, go for it.

You’re team needs your enthusiasm, your inspiration and your ability to adapt, be humble and patient. When called to action, they can trust you. High “I” Yo Silver, Away!

Embrace your High-C Behaviors

High-C’ers unite. That’s right. Your High-C behavior is powerful. Now, I’m not saying you’re better than others. No, well, at least, don’t go around saying that. As a High-C, you probably wouldn’t anyway. Just don’t. The High-C, or High Compliance behavioral trait brings an analytical view to projects, work and organizations. If you’re a High-C, do you find you tend to shift your team from a hurried pace to a slower, more thoughtful, investigatory cadence? Excellent. Your team needs you.

Now, let’s flip the point of view for a moment. As a High-C, have you experienced intolerance from the aggressive movers and shakers in your group? You know who I’m taking about, those folks that are ready to jump into a big pool of Hi-C without even knowing if it’s cherry or watermelon flavored. Unbelievable. (Notice what I did there with the Hi-C reference?) Your reflective natural tendency provides a ton of “whoa there” before teams makes mistakes. BUT, you can also be viewed as the person holding back progress if you’re not careful.

Let’s talk about those sellers in work group. These are the folks who LOVE to tell stories and consider their tales as evidence. As a High-C, you’re not as easily swayed. You need proof. Just because someone says it is, doesn’t mean you’re on board. And, you don’t believe others should buy into things as quickly either. But see, here’s the thing. It’s time to take a deep breath. Those story telling colleagues are passionate and exciting. They can sell. In fact, that’s their job. But, where do they get their stories? Within your organization, they count on you as a High-C to generate the evidence that whatever your organization does works. They’ll try to sell without that evidence, but you can fix that. Provide them data, help them shape their stories and then, let them go forth and inspire. Meanwhile, you can continue your work, more behind the scenes, doing what you do.

As a High-C, conflict is not you’re friend. You may even find your top repeated phrases are “Yeah, well…” with a hint of haughty derision. Sorry, I know that hurts. Don’t take is personally. Take is perspectively. You’re arms crossed, straight faced nature makes you intimidating to others at times. Understanding how to adapt is just as important for you as it for others. Remember, you provided the evidence others needed to do their work. They’ll love you for that. But, this doesn’t mean they have to be making all the adaptations so you feel valued. Watch your body language. And, in sessions where creativity is the focus, let the group explore and chime in with ways you can add value to the ideation process. Putting the breaks on imagination sessions will make you an unwelcome partner. In this case, think of phrases such as “I can give you some data on that idea to help showcase its impact.” This shows you can support an idea, even if it’s far fetched in your mind. Remembers, as you aim to provide the data, if you don’t find evidence, let them know how an idea could be modified. Be ready for a situation where the team just simply wants to try something new. In that case, play your supportive role and help collect NEW data.

Embrace your High-C and help your team achieve.